Acceptable Psychosis

Frank Maddish
7 min readJul 11, 2020

--

Hi my name’s [Insert name here] and I make [insert product here], but let’s not get ahead of ourselves. I began as a [generic label] and soon realised that [sales patter] before I realised I could change the [product] sector forever.

When I was young, the pitch was the exception if you listened long enough to anybody’s bullshit and it dawned upon you you were watching an advertorial, you almost felt like kicking the TV and hoped it might explode.

Nowadays things are different, and the general populous almost expect it, the spiel, the pitch, the hype, because life is cheap and tawdry and no matter how personal and subjective the experience, there’s usually a price tag attached.

We have no souls, we used to, but they’ve been commodified and extruded into something more useful, like opinions for market surveys or popular memes for the emotionally stunted. That’s the world we live in, the leftovers of another age, the dirty, crowded simulation of a memory that no one can remember.

I wonder, are you with me or against me, can we ever dig ourselves out of this cultural hole? I’d say not, but I’m a pessimist, I’ve seen too many good people die, and too many bad people win. I suppose it could be worse, at least the autocracy still have the decency to cover their tracks. But really, is this it, is there nothing more than this? I fear the future and what comes next, so few people remember how things used to be, even those were there have clouded memories. Because history is bullshit and culture is a con and the only thing we have left our own opinions.

Which isn’t saying much I know, those little people who rule the world, these number games are suffocating minds and stifling opinions, and yet we persist because we have no other options. If I were to create a world, I’d make sure of two things. Firstly, no one is in control, no leaders, no rulers, nobody to subjugate the masses. Secondly, no matter what, there can be no laws, even if it meant death, the principle still stands, you can’t rule over others, you have no right, this world of fleeting lives is just a sham.

The people who believe in the system, or any system at all, are the most gullible people ever born in history. They think there’s an order to society, when in fact it’s merely a smokescreen to cover up the ugly truth that nature isn’t quite as predictable as you’d first presumed.

This is how the world turns, for this is what the public want. We’ve been told how to think, and what to buy, and what to eat, what to wear, what to see. Even if it makes them sick, they’ll go along with the program. I almost feel like weeping, but I’m too burnt out to care, the chaos all around me only makes me wish for death. How many suicide notes should I write before I go, who knows, maybe a couple, or a thousand, I don’t know.

As I sit here and write my bullshit I can see a kitten running around my feet, it’s a ploy by my wife, but it works, it soothes my mind. Distractions can be miracles if you let them, the miracle of life, I guess I’m going to hang around for at least one more night. You know, I could do with a taste of wisdom now, my heart is breaking, my mind is broken, but I am trying my damnedest to hold on to life.

I used to feel the wave of change, the revolutionary zeal, the zeitgeist of my mind, the imperceptible charge within the air. Then something happened, and I ignored it, the movement of the ages, and before you know it, I was ousted from the new and delegated to the past. The creatures of comfort cannot placate my fears, my worries for the future. I’m not thinking of myself here; I am way past the point of selfless, I don’t care if I live or die, I just wonder what’s the point. Why should anybody exist, or persist in this folly of the mind, you do realise you are reaching the threshold of all-time?

I’m not trying to scare you, I don’t want to upset the apple cart, I have a brain, I have a heart, but they’re not connecting like they used to, they’re sending messages, but all I get are busy signals, empty gestures, frugal moves.

I once talked to a filmmaker in Australia, a lovely girl who tried to help, but she soon gave up on the venture. She soon realised there are no helping people like myself, we’ve been here too long, we’ve seen too much, we know how screwed up things really are.

I’d love to make peace with the world before I go and tell them I’m sorry and that I truly understand. Because deep down I honestly pity the human race, it cannot cope with what it is becoming, and it doesn’t want to know that what comes next. I pray to whatever has an inkling of what I’m saying to heal the rift and show the way.

Twenty years ago or so I’d escaped from a religious cult, I’m not joking, they were called ‘One World Creations.’ They made cheap jewellery for head shops around the world in the nineties. They were based in Bristol, England, and they did their best to brainwash me, but they failed, like so many others, because I’ve been there first, and I understood their intentions.

Nobody has all the answers, only questions and most of them are dumb as you can get. But here’s one for you that might make you think, if this reality is complete then why do you need to dream? It’s because this world is in pieces, and gaps have to be filled in the memories of so many people. For reality is closing in and collapsing under the weight of our mass scrutiny.

I feel so much love for people I’ve never met, my unofficial universal family, waiting in the wings. If you’re out there and you want to talk, Frank’s here, he’s waiting, this might just be your last chance. Should you need a symbolic shoulder to cry on, don’t hesitate to ask, I don’t mind, I’ve been there, I know, life is hard.

I feel you although I wish I didn’t. I can’t help it, it’s just the way I’m made. Come and get it while you can, tell me what you need. If you’ve have had enough of life do as I do, then scream at the world, you’re sick of the rules, of the limitations of society, the impropriety of fools that designate our movements, your actions, your moods. This is it, people, the time is upon us, if we don’t stand up to be counted, nothing will change the situation. The world is dying of disappointment, and it’s charging for this displeasure by the second.

To hell with money, to hell with the law, to hell with everything before, this is the moment when emotion become law. At least for the better, if not forever, because I’m running out of answers. Intellectualism is blind, our sensibilities are stretched beyond breaking point, and we have no more time to waste. Please tell me that you love me and I will do the same, we need to exchange emotion so we can all escape.

There’s nowhere else to go but backwards, and even time is damaged. I could tell it was at breaking point at such an early age. I hope you hear me, all my friends in the making, you are the solution to my problems and those that have troubled Earth since the beginning. Within you, the few that can still listen, the lost and dispossessed of human flotsam and jetsam, is the future in the making. I need to understand, so I can leave this place without feeling that I’ve completely failed the human race.

Come now, come forth, make sure you hold the light aloft, you are my angels, my loved ones, my family I have forgotten/ I want to see you thrive before this world collapses into something rotten. So much broken and ruined, hollowed out from the inside, ignored until it festers, a place in which I have no pride. It’s such a shame, I wish I’d met you long ago, instead of hiding in my cave and ignoring how much damage this life has taken.

This place of forgotten dreams and false promise, I still love you, but I can’t resist the temptations of another world. Yet I must, for I cannot forsake those who I have made a promise. The last few human spirits whose souls remain intact, please do not forsake me, I have failed you, but I will persist at any price. I lead no one, I have nothing, for I am merely an anomaly, a fragment of a society that no longer wishes to exist.

You make me weep, the culture creep, the nullification of the heart and soul, the end of time as I perceive it, empty space and hollow motives, what can we do but grieve lost potential? To mourn the novelty of invention, we must speculate our own attraction to the implosion of our own meaning. Once again I tell you, you are my saviour in disguise, a hidden wonder, a lost perspective, a broken window leading forth to paradise.

Come with me, hold my hand, we can go together. We can change reality with thought and feeling; if only we tried. it’s a numbers game, and if enough of us refuse to play, the rules will change. Do it now, do it here, and you will see that I am not lying. Why would I? What possible reason could I have, what motivation would inspire? We are one, you and I and all who know what must be done, come now and let it be, this world as we know it must be undone.

Read More at: www.FrankMaddish.com

--

--

Frank Maddish
Frank Maddish

Written by Frank Maddish

A homespun philosopher looking for meaning in a meaningless world. www.thinkingallowed.cc

No responses yet